Taiwaneers

What better topic is there than to write about weird stuff that happens while we go to the bathroom here? I’m not really sure that there is any so I better get started.

This hasn’t been happening the entire time we’ve been here, in fact it only started a few weeks ago. It only happens here in our house’s bathroom. At least I’ve never experienced it in any of the other bathrooms here in Taiwan or anywhere else for that matter. It has become regular enough so that when I use the bathroom I wonder if it will happen but it hasn’t escalated into an every day kind of regularity. Its still irregular enough so that I wonder if it will happen ‘this time’ but then again I can still get caught off guard when it does. I don’t know why it has started but theorize that it might have something to do with the construction going on across the street from us.

Imagine yourself sitting down in your own house on your own John, or Loo (shout out to Darren), to take necessary actions, making life that much more comfortable. Now imagine a sudden gust of cool air shooting into the area where necessary actions are being performed from the hole in your John that makes it uniquely connected to the outside world unlike all the other chairs in your house. The sudden gust lasts for about a second. Short enough to wonder what just happened but long enough to know it happened. While you confirm with yourself that you did indeed just experience a gust of cool air shoot up from the hole in your ‘special chair’ imagine your nostrils suddenly sending signals to your brain that there is now a vile and rancid odor that wasn’t there moments before. Mercifully, much like the gust, this odor wafts through and is gone.

Now imagine that this was really happening at someone’s house somewhere in the world.

After reading the above paragraphs I feel it necessary to point out that the water levels in ‘special chairs’ here in Taiwan are significantly lower then in the USA. If you need to reimagine the above without the geyser you thought about but that wasn’t there please feel free to re-read this post.